Essays, Blather, and Pontifications

Yes, you will probably find most of these essays highly opinionated. Why on earth would I take the time to write them if I didn't get to stand on a soap box and dish attitude? In most cases, people have already had a chance to reply to these opinions in some forum or another, so no, I'm not especially interested if you disagree with them now. Feel free to write a counterargument and post it on your own web site.

My Adventures In Pharma-Land, or, Dave Gets A Cold

How am I supposed to choose the right cold medicine if I'm sick enough to need a cold medicine?? November 2000

Cons And Pros: Why Comping Isn't An Entitlement

If a convention expects you to sit in front of a room of people and talk for a couple hours over a weekend, the least they can do is buy your membership to the convention, isn't it? February 1998

They're the Exact Same Thing, Except This One's More Unique

Dismaying proof that "more unique" and "exactly the same" are completely proper English. February 2003

Why the Metric System is Kilo-Better Than Traditional Units of Measurement

Feet, pounds, and gallons vs. meters, grams, and liters. It's like Barney vs. Godzilla. March 1997

Why I Hate Unix (Part V)

It's like the world's biggest toy, it's Christmas Eve, and the box contains the instructions for every toy ever created, all written in dialects of Japanglish. May 2005

Why I Hate Unix (Part VI)

More misery at the hands of sadistic OS. December 2005

The Lord's Prayer for the 21st Century

Inspired by example, I humbly re-interpret the Lord's Prayer in contemporary terms. March 2000

Why I'm Getting Married This Summer

So much sound and fury over such a simple idea. February 2004

Rail

An illustrated travelog of an exceptionally pleasant trip from Seattle to Chicago via Amtrak. December 2006